Le Grand Continental-Boston…in the Rear View Mirror

vitruvian_man-001Three times this weekend I stood on a blue circle in Copley Square and danced for thirty minutes with 111 other Bostonians in Le Grand Continental.  It was an incredible experience in dance and community. Like many other peak experiences, it uncovered unexpected life-lessons:

 

1. My best dancing is total stillness. Friday night, after torrential downpours, we took our places on the square. We were wet, our steps were splashy, but the energy of the dedicated crowd was infectious. Midway through the show the choreography includes a crossover that results in us lying on the pavement for the subsequent children’s number. My position was smack center; the youngsters gyrate within a foot of my head.

I realized my crossover destination was more than a puddle. It was a pool. The crowd gasped as we fell onto the granite.   The water saturated my jeans. It wicked up my shirt through my chest.  My socks, my wallet, my stomach, my iPhone, everything drifted in the chilly water. The children began stomping. Water splashed over my every pore.

On cue, we adults began to move; horizontal jitters in the water. Finally, I got up and continued to dance.  That night, and at every performance thereafter, people came up and exclaimed at my complete stillness during drenching.  No one commented on the 28 minutes when I moved – only the two minutes when I was a soggy corpse.

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Dancing in the Water Friday Night

2. Even in celebration, some people cannot be happy. On Saturday, a beautiful spring night with crisp air and full moon, the troupe was enthused about performing, dry, before a capacity crowd.  A few minutes before performance, the befeathered woman who was my leaning partner during the Ima section, pulled me aside and said, “Your article offended many in the Hispanic community.” I made a politically correct apology and scanned my memory to figure what I possibly wrote in The Boston Globe that could be offensive.

After an exhilarating show, I got home and reviewed the passage: “There’s a precocious 8-year-old boy, a group of giggly Hispanic girls, an immense black women who moves so smooth she appears weightless, several mother/daughter teams, a preponderance of middle-aged women who, like me, forget our gray hair and gravity’s sag when our feet flow, and a handful of elderly ladies whose frail bodies are long past flexible, but whose steps are firm.”

I feel sorry for any human whose defenses are so tight that the adverb ‘giggly’ causes offense.

3. Everything has a positive spin. By sunny Sunday afternoon, we were all in our groove.  For the first half of the show I danced in a line facing the audience. I abandoned the theatrical pretense of the fourth wall. I laughed as I danced and smiled when the audience took my picture.  An elderly woman in a wheelchair sat directly in front of me.  I danced right up to her, spun around and winked upon my return.  She had a great smile of her own. We both enjoyed our flirtation.

I ran into Betty at the after party – she’s the mother of another dancer. I told her how much I appreciated her enthusiasm and admired the bicycle gloves she wore, dressier than mine. Betty demonstrated how they helped her grip her big wheels. Then she said, “You’ve got a great ass, and since I spend so much time at this height,” she gestured to her permanent sitting state, “I am an expert on asses.”

I thanked her for the nicest compliment I’d received in some time and wondered how many other people could find a benefit in being wheelchair bound.

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Me on Sunday afternoon (in black T-shirt) – sorry my butt shots.

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Another Dancer’s Story from Le Grand Continental

vitruvian_man-001Thanks to all the people who responded to my article in The Boston Globe and shared their own stories of neophyte dancers with dreams of ballet and Broadway.  One of the most inspiring was from Lill, whom I featured in my article, and her chorus line turn at a Big Ten football game 25 years ago in honor of Gene Kelly.  Lill gave me permission to share her story:

“One summer, the University of Iowa had an article in the summer newspaper announcing open auditions – with a need for 100 “hoofers” to dance in a tribute to Gene Kelly at the half-time of a football game! Now this was Big 10 Football when the Big 10 really had 10 schools and the stadium seated 67,000 rabid fans! Gene Kelly was going to be at Iowa for a week as Artist in Residence in their Dance Department. I’d taken dance from age 4 to 17 and especially loved tap dancing! I can still do the “time steps”! So I didn’t tell anyone and went to the auditions. They slapped a number on my front and back – and there were hundreds of young folks auditioning – many many from Iowa’s dance department, sitting warming up by stretching in the splits, literally wrapping their legs around their head! Oh well — it would be fun. Similar to LGC we did learn a short routine — but we also, for example, had to do “tap flap turns” across the entire dance floor. I told the young girl in front of me to just reach out her arm at the end so I could grab it because I hadn’t “spotted” turns in years and years! To make a long story short, I got in! I was the oldest person there – and one of the few from the community rather than from the University – remember the prize so to speak was dancing at a Big 10 football game!

“We wore black tights, black ballet slippers and yellow rain slickers – had black and yellow striped umbrellas we actually used in the routine – and if you haven’t guessed it by now, our routine was to Singin’ in the Rain and at the end we actually formed an umbrella formation and Gene Kelly came out and danced with us! Fabulous to meet him!  So when I saw the audition notice for LGC, it was my second chance to do something like this.”

I believe there is a performer in all of us.  If you have any doubts, come to Le Grand Continental this Friday or Saturday night at 8:30 p.m. or Sunday at 3:00 p.m. in Copley Square.  This is a free performance for our community from the folks at Celebrity Series.

Robert Etcheverry

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Learn to Love Something By Doing It

vitruvian_man-001This essay was originally published in The Arts Fuse, May 11, 2014.

When I auditioned to be a member of the Le Grand Continental-Boston (LGC), Celebrity Series choreographed street dance of local citizens, I expected to meet people beyond my usual sphere, learn cool dance steps, and have fun.  In the three months between auditions and our upcoming Copley Square performances May 16, 17, and 18, LGC has exceeded all of those expectations. But my first foray into choreography has also brought an unexpected benefit: a deeper appreciation for dance.

Robert Etcheverry

From the first rehearsal I realized that the dancing I enjoy at clubs and weddings is different from dance as an art form. I can apply pressure to my partner’s shoulder to guide him through a jitterbug swing or waltz turn, but coordinating multiple bodies through space to music is logarithmically more complex. Simple gestures aggregate into complex moves, which become challenging sequences. I began by memorizing step A + step B + step C, a sound, though tedious, method of learning.  Practice videos with music proved difficult to follow, but I valued the ones with counts.  I understood dance as a math problem. Over time, patterns emerged, repetition, then order, and finally, the accents that interrupt order.

LGC Paul. Ctsy Celebrity Series, Robert Torres

I discovered elements of yoga and running embedded in our choreography. Then I found dance in everyday movement; mundane chores like hanging laundry and raking leaves induced motion that evoked dance. As I mastered sequences, I craved further complexity.

I’ve seen Boston Ballet once or twice, but knew little about our city’s other dance offerings. My curiosity led me to Alvin Ailey at the Wang Center as well as spring performances by the Boston Conservatory and local dance troupe Urbanity. After witnessing three performances within a month, I was struck by the physical and emotional wallop dance can offer.

The Boston Conservatory’s Limitless demonstrated the range that aspiring professional dancers must achieve and illustrated aspects of dance I’d never considered.  That Mark Morris’ Canonic ¾ Studies could be so funny or Dwight Rhoden’s Fits of Hissy so precisely exhausting.  Tommy Nesbitt’s The Past is a Foreign Country explored the trauma of the Kosovo War with an emotional depth that transcended words. Following that with Karole Armitage’s decadent Rave seemed inappropriate on the program page, yet felt exactly right in time and space.

RAVE. Photo by Eric Antoniou.

Alvin Ailey presented a pinnacle experience. The visual and emotional impact of the company pulsing in the syncopated gallop of Aszure Barton’s LIFT resonated for days afterward.

Yet Urbanity’s performance spoke most directly to me. Perhaps the cognitive leap between my own abilities and those on stage didn’t seem insurmountable, merely huge. Urbanity offers so many ways to dance: children; adults; seniors; amateurs; professionals, there’s a place for all. The quality of dance was high, but the purpose and dedication that each dancer brought to the stage was even higher.

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My exposure to professional dance evoked two questions. First, is there a common thread that ties Urbanity’s high school student Peter Mazurowski and Alvin Ailey veteran Antonio Douthit-Boyd? Second, why has my street dancing in Copley Square triggered this broader exploration?

The commonality I discerned between Limitless, Alvin Ailey, and Urbanity is dance’s ability to tackle thorny issues while maintaining human connection.  The dozen dances I witnessed addressed confrontation, love, war, and death. Yet the very nature of dance demands we maintain relationships to one another. Every move by every dancer is tied to every other human on stage. As long as we cling to the tension that binds us, humanity’s potential to triumph remains strong.

Why this seems relevant to me now is a matter any educator or social scientist can explain. When we immerse ourselves in something, anything, we appreciate and respect it more. The Celebrity Series is investing significant time, money, and personal energy to present Le Grand Continental.  In exchange 112 people are enjoying an experience that enhances our relationship to an art form.  Hopefully, the thousands more who attend will gain fresh perspective on art in general and dance in particular.

Art requires people to perform as well as people to witness. The Wallace Foundation has documented that becoming an art producer, even in my own rudimentary way, increases a person’s appetite to consume it. In the art world, supply and demand grow together.  The more art we create, the more we crave art.

In a nation where public funding of the arts continues to decline and there is a measurable disconnect between arts education priorities and funding, we must constantly stir the creative pot of artistic endeavor. Otherwise, artistic initiatives will stagnate.

I hope thousands of people show up to see Le Grand Continental this weekend. Not to see me, but to see how dance can change the way we appreciate our world.

Robert Etcheverry 2

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12-Step Program to Turn an Angry Young Man into a Pollyanna

vitruvian_man-001Forty years ago, while discussing the inequities of our world at a deep night college party – ranting is the more accurate verb – my friend peered over his beer and shook his head. “You are one angry young man.”

My head struck a firm nod in agreement. “Damn straight, I’m angry. And I’m going to do something about it.”

Last week, I came whistling out of the locker room after yoga and my young teacher asked, “Why are you always so upbeat?”

I tossed her a smile and a wink as I headed out the door.  “It beats being grumpy.”

Riding home I recalled that college party and wondered how that angry young man turned into this cheerful yogi. I can’t pretend my anger dissipated because the world improved or that I saved even a morsel of it. The world’s the same old mess with a different cast of characters. But I was able to identify specific moments when my anger melted into understanding, compassion, and eventually, joy.

1. Be Like Sissy Hankshaw.  “The international situation was desperate as usual” is a recurring phrase of dread that haunts our antiestablishment heroine as she hitchhikes across the middle of this great country in Tom Robbins’ 1976 novel, Even Cowgirls Get the Blues. But that reality never dampens Sissy’s adventure. In the 70’s, communication brought every tragedy into every living room. Now tragedy pops up on our iPhones.  The world has no more problems than before; they just get more airtime. Be like Sissy and learn to ignore them.

2. Volunteer. The first time you volunteer you think, “I’m going to save others.” Then you realize whatever benefit you produced was meager compared to what you gained yourself. Keep doing it anyway. Volunteer early and often, near and far from home. It’s the quickest way to see the world through another person’s eyes.

3. The Best of All Possible Worlds. In my late twenties I was a member of church social group. One evening we debated Doctor Pangloss’ assertion in Voltaire’s Candide, that this is the best of all possible worlds.  I was the sole person in agreement with Voltaire. Humans seek, but we are never satisfied. The setbacks imposed by nature, inhumanity, and satirical authors deserve to be railed against and set right.  But they will never stay right, nor would we be content if they did. The best possible world isn’t perfect.  It’s this one, where perfection is just out of reach.

4. Sing and Dance. Singing and dancing builds community, empathy, and strength. Not just at weddings and parties, but also at protests and wakes.  Singing elevates emotion; dancing releases tension. They make you feel good despite yourself. No one can ever sing and dance too much.

5. Avoid Lawyers. Life is unfair.  Once you accept that, everything else can roll easy. Strive to be fair in all of your dealings so you can sleep at night. Relinquish the slights others deliver to you and you will sleep even better.  Confound the poor dude who crosses you. Shower him with kindness. That ought to ruin his sleep.

6. Have Children. Studies show that people without children are happier than people with children. This says more about the transitory nature of happiness and the vagaries of statistical studies than it does about the value of children. Children may not make you happy in the moment, but they enhance your connection to humanity and expand your concern for the world.  Children allow us to re-experience the world through their eyes. They are the conduit to rescripting our youth as well as contributing to the chain that will continue after we’re gone. They cost a fortune. They can be surly and insolent. But they also provide lasting joy that supersedes mere happiness

7. Cry for Joy. One afternoon, during year two after my divorce, I was working in my attic while Michael Feinstein warbled through Johnny Mandel’s Where Do You Start for the thousandth time. I cried so hard my gut wretched, which was an awesome core workout before core workouts had even been invented.  When I finally stopped, long after the song was through, I thought I’d expunged all the tears in me.  But I was wrong. Two days later my daughter demonstrated how to push milk out of her nose and I laughed so hard I cried. Since then I’ve never cried in sadness, only in joy.

8. Find your Fitness. I’m a yoga junkie but not a zealot. What works for me doesn’t have to work for you. First World living requires little from our bodies, yet we still have them and they need to be put through their paces.  Whether it’s rugby, roller blading, or ring toss, find a way to keep your body moving.

9. Spin, spin, spin. Clouds do not have sliver linings. In fact, clouds have no linings at all.  They’re nothing but gas. A few things in this world are utterly evil (Hitler, child slavery, bed bugs) while others are completely pure (babies, full moons, ice cream), but the vast majority of material goods and pronounced opinions are a sprinkling of both.  The more you choose to accentuate the positive, the more the positive will flourish.

10. Be obsessed by something nobody cares about. Find something that you love and drill deep.  The amount of personal satisfaction is directly proportional to its obscurity.  Following stock prices may be your thing, but you’ll get more satisfaction from craving Red Sox trivia and will be truly happy if you’re mesmerized by New England sea grass.  A carefully crafted bit of alliteration can keep me giddy for days.

11. Slow Go.  Use the slowest form of transport to get from A to B.  You will save energy and savor the journey.

12. Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway. Read Susan Jeffer’s book if you want, but the title says it all. We are all afraid of ourselves, of what we know, and what we don’t know.  Acknowledge your fear but don’t let it hold you back. Rise above. Celebrate this messed up place. It could be better in so many ways, yet it is our home and we wouldn’t trade it for… the world.

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In the Zone

awkward_pose_3-001I went into the studio Sunday noon and laid my mat in a favorite place beneath the skylight tight to the front mirror. I like the way the rays highlight my poses. All the better still if the sun steaming in makes me hotter. Though the room was plenty hot and humid. Well past 100 degrees, topping 40% moisture. I was cloaked in sweat before completing my pranyama warm-up.

Next thing I recall with certainty was laying savasana in a shallow pool of my own warm water. An hour passed.  My body moved through the 26 Bikram poses and CorePower flows. I breathed regular and hard. At times my mind spun fast. A knotty schedule problem bore down on me during eagle, pressing my thighs and elbows tighter than usual, etching the conflicts of the upcoming week into my brain like a 6H pencil. Other times my mind went blank.  How else to explain the hour that evaporated with my sweat?

It wasn’t a stellar class in terms of form – I recall falling out of some balances.  But it was intense in focus.  The light, the mirror inches from my hands, every other body receding from my perspective. I can’t remember it all, which means it was great yoga.

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Singing and Riding in the Rain

0009997_Haiti_Diagram_Paul_Fallon_101103One of the hidden pleasures of being a cyclist is singing as I ride.  True, it’s possible to sing in my car, but the sound comes back at me instead of adding to the vibration of the universe.  I can also sing when I walk, but I move so slow through space others hear me. When I sing out loud I do it for me. I don’t want others to hear and they’re gladly spared my noise.  On my bicycle I can send the tune out from me and by the time someone else absorbs the sound, I’ve rolled on.

Bicycle singing inspires wonderful rhythmic alteration. Coming up behind a pedestrian, whose ears I respect, I take whatever note I’m on and extend it into a soft sostenuto.  My passerby hears nothing but an eerie bit of breeze.

This year’s long winter and cool spring have done nothing to elevate the soul. I’ve been forced to dig deep into my repertoire to keep spirits high. March, New England’s signature grotesque month, requires I chortle through every upbeat 50’s musical while pedaling against the wind driving down the Charles River. I’ve never met a gale that could overcome Frank Loesser’s I Believe in You. April’s storms can always been humbled by the maxim April Showers bring May Flowers.

But it’s May 1, the temperature is stuck in the forties, the rain is hard, the wind from the northwest. The calendar displays it’s time for Camelot’s Merry Month of May, but there’s nary a sign of May about.  I could go depressive with Karen Carpenter’s Rainy Days and Mondays, or emotionally pathological with When You Walk Through a Storm, but I’m, trying to keep things light and spring like in my head, my heart, and my voice.

Got any suggestions?

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Forsythia blooms smothered in rain

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Shoulders and Plow

awkward_pose_3-001I am obedient by nature. I follow the yoga teacher’s instructions and execute every pose.  Sometimes I lag, since I flow slower than many, but I sequence through and catch up in downward dog. Teacher’s give permission for variation when they say, Do your own practice, but I prefer to be with the group.  That is why I attend class as opposed to doing yoga in my den.

However, I have started to do my own thing.  It began about a month ago; when just before savasana I felt the urge to activate my back. The class included a lot of hip work, and my back was itching for action. When everyone else lay flat, I hiked into shoulder stand, hung up there a minute, and then lowered into plow. I let my toes balance on the floor beyond my head. I drew a very long, very slow arc of straight legs into the air and lowered myself to the mat for savasana. I remembered this ending sequence from my first yoga classes, many years ago.

I’ve never had the shoulder / plow duo within a CorePower class. Too bad. Shoulder is my favorite inversion. It provides the advantages of reorienting my relationship to gravity, flushing my head with blood, stabilizing my core, and refining my equilibrium; without the anxiety of trying to get into headstands or the futility of handstands. Going upside down is difficult for me. Shoulder Stand offers benefits with stability.

Moving from shoulder into plow is a natural transition. It’s graceful. The back stretch feels wonderful, and delivers corresponding core strengthening without conscious effort. When my toes touch the floor far beyond my head, I feel simultaneously light and grounded and, if I’m in a metaphorical mind space, envision myself as a nautilus.

Following plow with a long ascent and descent into savasana is satisfying.  Knowing that this is the last stress of class, I unwind very slowly. Each abdominal clenches as I lift my legs. By the time my feet pike over my head, each vertebra grips the mat in succession.  When my entire back is on the mat, the stress returns to my front. I lower my straight legs as slow as possible to the floor.  It’s a game, to move in steady but tiny increments.

Perhaps it’s odd to have such a strenuous move as the final expression of a yoga class, but I like calling all of my resources to flow from plow, which has restful attributes, all the way to the other side of myself and into savasana, the fullest expression of rest.

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Plow Pose

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Foot Chakras

awkward_pose_3-001In honor of Earth Day our yoga instructor Maureen led a class that emphasized our connection to the earth.  We began in Toe Squat Pose. Toe Squat is a yin pose, and like most yin poses, it looks easy but is not. Stand on your knees, tuck your toes under the balls of your feet and sit back on our heels.  Keep your torso long and your gaze straight.  It can be a challenge to get your weight out of your toes and on to the balls of your feet. Tuck all your toes – including the pinky toe – flat on the mat. Sit for three to five minutes.

Modifications include putting a block between your heels and your bum or placing a block on either side of your hips and putting some arm weight on the blocks.  Either modification relieves pressure in the balls of your feet and your toes.

Toe Squat taps into two related energy systems of yoga.  First, it activates all six energy meridians that go through the feet and release energy through the toes, the liver, gall bladder, kidney, urinary bladder, spleen, and stomach meridians. Second, Toe Squat triggers the feet chakras.

Our feet contain many minor chakras, but there are seven specific energy points that correspond to the seven main chakras that run from the base of our pelvis to the top of our head. These chakras are the conduits between the energy of the earth and the energy of our bodies. They run from the base of our heel (Root), along the inner ridge of our arch (Sacral, Solar Plexus), to the bottom edge of the ball of our foot (Heart), across the ball of our foot (Throat), to the base of our big toe (Third Eye), and the top of our big toe (Crown).  The foot chakras are organized in a semi-circular pattern around our instep. When we put our heels and toes together, we join the seven charkas of each foot into a full circle.

When I assumed Toe Squat I noticed increased connection to my breath, which is consistent with the high pressure this pose sends through the foot chakra that corresponds with the throat.

If you would like a more relaxing way to stimulate the foot chakras, I recommend the massage described in this video. How to Give a Wonderful Reflex Foot Rub

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8 Movie Scenes that Shaped my Life

poppinsMary Poppins – 1964

Jane and Michael Banks leave their house with Bert and Mary. Michael slithers around the column in the front of their house.  That image is the genesis of my fascination with the intersection of architecture and play. It was directly responsible for my Master of Architecture thesis, Architecture that Affords Play.

 

oliverOliver! – 1968

Oliver stands on Mr. Brownlow’s porch and sings the refrain “who will buy this magical moment.” The vulnerable boy who finds a moment of peace is the image I conjure whenever I feel down.

 

 

cowboyMidnight Cowboy – 1969

Brenda Vaccaro taunts John Voigt when the hustler fails to deliver in bed and goads him into a sexual frenzy. The scene was my first awareness of human sexuality’s range and complexity.

 

CabaretCabaret – 1972

Liza Minnelli returns from the abortion doctor without her beloved fur coat. I realized how unsatisfying material objects are for our well being, yet how handy they can be in a fix.

 

 

gandhiGandi – 1982

The opening and closing shots of the film are Gandhi’s assassination.  The scenes reveal a truth of human nature – even a film about the twentieth century’s greatest pacifist depends on violence to sell. Was it necessary to show it twice?

heartPlaces in the Heart – 1984

The closing scene of family passing the communion plate in church moves from Sally Field to her family, and on to other characters, no longer alive. The scene is the most beautiful representation of life’s continuity.

fidelityHigh Fidelity – 2000

Rob (John Cusack) is connected and alive at the first concert he’s produced. Laura (Iben Hajele) says he’s finally participating in life, not just watching it. It doesn’t matter whether what we what we make in life is brings fortune or fame, it only matters that we are invested enough to create it.

lightsKeep the Lights On – 2012

Erik chases his crack-addicted lover Paul to a hotel suite. Paul calls Eric into the bedroom to hold his hand while a male prostitute penetrates him. The scene is incomprehensible at any rational level, which makes it a powerful statement to the extremes we will endure for love.

 

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Chelsea Handler and the Nonagenarian Nun

vitruvian_man-001Twice a year I drive out to Albany for lunch. It’s not an efficient trip. I drive three hours each way along the Mass Pike to spend two, maybe three, hours with my ninety-two year old aunt.

Aunt Fran is a nun.  When I was a child her cheeks bulged out of a starched wimple. Then Vatican Two liberated her theology and unclamped her face. For a few years she had short grey curls. But her natural hair withered in sunlight and for the past forty years she’s worn a Pat Nixon-style grey wig. Like many old people, Aunt Fran is shrinking.  My oldest living family member, who was standard size when I was a child, is now barely five feet tall, and weighs less than 100 pounds. Unfortunately the wig is the same size, which makes her a bobble head with a walker.

Since two-thirds of my time visiting Aunt Fran is driving, and since the Mass Pike is an over-familiar road with poor radio reception, I go to the library the day before to get a book on tape.  I like to listen to history.  During my years of long work trips I chewed through serious stuff: Nathanial Philbrook’s Mayflower; David McCollough’s 1776; Doris Kearn Goodwin’s Team of Rivals; Al Gore’s Assault on Reason. But long drives are rare these days. I wanted something fully digestible in six hours, so I lightened up and plucked My Horizontal Life off the library shelf.

I’d heard the name Chelsea Handler the way I know Ryan Seacrest and Jessica Simpson; representatives of popular culture who filter through the ether but don’t intersect with any sphere of my life. The jacket promised humorous short stories. Wary of hype, I also picked up a David Sedaris backup.

It rained so hard all way to Albany and all the way back I hydroplaned across the Berkshires. Chelsea proved to be good company, a blond Jewess with an eccentric father from a big New Jersey family. Except for observing religion on a different day, I felt right at home. Her stories, one-night-stand tales with a dental floss of narrative thread, were more funny than obscene though I winced when she turned scatological.

My aunt lives in a gigantic compound of 1960’s boxes on a hill, built at the height of America’s Kennedy clan / Sound of Music fascination with Catholicism and nuns. Built to accommodate over 600 novitiates and sisters, the Provincial House now shelters less than 100 women, almost all over 80. Dorm rooms have been repurposed for nursing home care.

Aunt Fran is among the lucky.  Her mind is sharp, her walker provides mobiity, and as long as you sit on her right side and talk very loud, she can hear. She’s not as feisty as she was back in her glory years with Dorothy Day and The Catholic Worker, but any of us would be grateful to have her faculties at age 92.

She’s sitting on one of the dozen or so plastic-covered sofas in the foyer when I enter.  We hug. I report on my children’s activities. I’ve brought slides of my trip to Cambodia. She’s interested, until she’s not. Aunt Fran’s always been inpatient and as we age, our peculiarities only grow stronger. Enough of that, she shouts in the overloud voice of the deaf, and we walk down to lunch where the smattering of old women fills a quarter of tables.  There is a crucifix on the end wall next to a garish Pepsi dispensing machine.  The juxtaposition makes me anxious.  The wounded, dying Jesus just a foot away from bubbly refreshment.

We visit for half an hour more after lunch until Aunt Fran announces she is tired. I escort her to her room and I depart. During the drive home Chelsea Handler succeeds in bedding a Vegas male stripper but fails to get under her hot gynecologist.  I wonder whether there’s purpose to Chelsea’s antics, I seek a parallel between the twenty-something hedonist and my ancient aunt who’ve consumed my day.  But there isn’t. I’m just another guy plodding through the years. Doing my duty to the generation before me and bewildered by the one coming up behind.

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